12.07.2008

SO MISSED

This is so hard. There is no way words can explain or express how painful this can be. Trish is SO strong, yet SO broken hearted. We miss our boy so much.

This (Saturday) morning was a very tough morning for Trish. She woke up without any kicks in her tummy and empty arms. It was devastating for her and there was nothing I could do about it. I feel so helpless that I cannot take away her pain. I pray to God for guidance, but I cannot bring our son back.

I cannot imagine walking this road without knowing Jesus Christ as our savior. We cling to the comfort of knowing that our Max is with Him having the time of his life.....eternal Bliss. Also, knowing that we will one day be reunited with Maxson in heaven.

THANK YOU ALL for your prayers and support. I never imagined how many would come through and support us through this blog.....truly amazing.

It is late and I am very tired so i'm going to stop here. I am going to leave you with a few more pictures of our BEAUTIFUL SON. There will be more to come.

Love,

Dustin






52 comments:

Anonymous said...

Max is such a cutie; a very special little angel. Thought out your trials and struggles in life, remember, God is just a whisper away; Max is just a heartbeat away. My prayers will continue to be with you, that the Lord will give you the grace needed at this time.

Verna said...

He is so beautiful! Being there for each other is all you can do. Communication with each other on feelings, etc. I cannot immagine how it feels to loose a little one, but God will give you strength, each day, each moment as you need it. We will continue to pray for you and your families, Keep trusting God, he will carry you through!

Mrs. Cup said...

Praying for you and your families. The pictures are beautiful! What a precious boy!

Susan said...

Thank you for letting us know your specific prayer needs. My heart is heavy for your family...but you are so right. How could you do it without The One, who knows your pain and sadness, who will walk with you each step of your journey. Please just know that I am praying for you in all the days to come. Max IS beautiful and SO perfect. May God comfort you today and forever.

Susan in Indiana

Laurie in Ca. said...

Many prayers for you in the days ahead, asking God to continue to be your strength. He is close to you and will help you through moment by moment. Maxon is so beautiful. I am so sorry for empty arms and broken hearts. Praying for you.

Laurie

Cameron said...

I am SO SORRY you even have to experience this. The sadness and pain on your faces reduce me to tears. I CAN NOT even understand what you are going through. My heart hurts for you and yet you are the ones experiencing this. I can only imagine how you are feeling. Know that people who don't even know you are praying for you and wishing we could comfort you in some way. I hope our prayers are felt. God is holding all three of you in the palm of His hands right now. He is especially loving and hugging your precious boy. He is beautiful!!!!

Jess said...

He is gorgeous!!!! You will cherish these pictures. I have thought so much about your family over the past three days. I know Max is in heaven with my little guy and we will all be together again, for eternity. For now, cry, lean, pray and remember that there is no "right" or "wrong" way to do anything right now. Thinking of you...

Charity said...

What a blessing to have had nearly three hours with your precious boy! My prayers will continue to be with your family as you move through this grief. All your prayers, even the silent groans (Romans 8:26), are heard by our Heavenly Father. May He continue to supply your needs and meet you where you are.

Alexandra's Mommy said...

Thinking about you and praying for you!

The Schulers

Mrs. Mother said...

He is so beautiful. Please take comfort in the knowledge you were able to hold him and speak to him and snuggle him. Those memories will last a lifetime.

I wish we could find a way to eradicate Trisomy 18 from this world so that no parent would ever have to know that pain. Big hugs to you. If you haven't already visited it, www.trisomy18support.org is an amazing site for those of us who have lost a child due to this disorder.

Nichole said...

Thank you so much for sharing these pictures of your angel. My life is changed for it. Max gives me a glimpse of GOD here on Earth and restores my faith in our Saviour.

Amen.

Misty Rice-Baniewicz said...

Im so sorry for your loss.... God bless you all. What a beautiful little guy you have. Precious pictures, painful pictures and all at the same time joyful pictures.

God Bless.

Laura said...

So beautiful...praying for all of your hearts.

rls07 said...

I found my way to this blog. I am so very sorry. Max is beautiful. I'm so sorry for you loss and my prayers and thoughts will be with your family during this difficult time. You have a gorgeous angel watching over you and I know that doesn't give you much comfort.

Open your Eyes. said...

One word: BEAUTIFUL! X.

Jenney said...

There isn't anything I can say and I'm not even going to try. I will continue to pray and cry for your family.

Radar's Mom said...

Dear Dustin,

I am so very sorrry for your loss and that it is so hard to know how to help Trish. Just be there for her. Grief is a time when we need our faith and we need the love and support of our family and friends. Despite that, it is still a lonely time for each person, I think particularly for a mother. Grief is not a short or easy journey, but it is so clear that you both have the strength and love to walk hand in hand through this difficult journey. And to help sustain you, you have the precious memories of your darling Max who blessed your lives and so many through the miracle of his life. He is so beautiful and your pictures as a family of three melt my heart.

I continue to hold you, Trish and sweet Max in my heart and in my prayers.

Love,
Christena

Courtney said...

Max is such a handsome little man ... I have no doubts that he's safe in the arms of Jesus! You've stayed on my heart and in my prayers, and I pray for God to bring an unbelieveable peace to both of you...

Lamentations 3:32-33
Though He brings grief, He will show compassion, so great is His unfailing love.

Julie said...

He is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing them. We are praying for your family.

Danielle said...

Your little boy is the most angelic child I have ever seen. God bless you and your family during this time.

Penny said...

Blessings and peace to you both. Max is such a beautiful boy..... What a blessing to have got to spend a bit of time with your fabulous little guy. I wish it had been longer for you.

Praying for your peace......

Ashley said...

Your son is beautiful, thank you for sharing him with us.

I will be praying for your whole family.

sheabetmc said...

What a beautiful baby boy. You will cherish that time with him forever...and remember every single move he made. Stay strong and keep your faith in our Lord. May God bless your family.

Bethany McNease
Hattiesburg, MS

Stacy D said...

Max is so beautiful... I am just so, so sorry for your loss.

And you are right. There is no way to imagine how hard this is. There are really no words.

Just please know that another broken-hearted momma is praying for you today. Today our sweet Isaac would have turned 2 months old. I know the feeling of those aching arms so well...

~ Stacy

petrii said...

Maxson is so cute. So sorry for all of your pain. I will keep praying.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Max is adorable.
May the Lord comfort you and bring you peace, strength, Faith, hope and love.

From
Em
in Australia

Anonymous said...

Hey Trish and Dustin, I just wanted to let you both know that you are in my prayers. I am so proud to know you guys, your so strong and such good people. Know that Maxson is with God. We are always here for you, no matter what it is that you might need.
Justin

Melissa Dovel said...

Just wanted to comment so that you know just how many people are touched by your journey. I am a fellow mommy so I know how the love of your first child floods your heart. I dont know your pain but I do pray that the Lord reign HIS kind of peace all over you both. Sending hugs and prayer and celebrating with you on your perfect child. He is beautiful, just like his momma and daddy.

Blessings
The Dovel House
Texas

Carla Burlando said...

What beautiful pictures to remember those precious three hours...such a sweetie. I know I can't say anything that will ease the sadness right now. The feeling of helplessness for you Dustin must be unbearable. Its hard to not want to fix it and take the sadness from your wife. You need each other yet both of you will grieve differently. Be there for her...in whatever way she needs at the time. And what she needs might be all over the place from time alone or to a chest to cry on. This blog world is an amazing way to bring information, support and especially prayer...a way to bring together those who have or are walking the road of grief. Know that I am praying for both of you each day. My heart is breaking for you Dustin and Trish.

Carla Burlando said...

From Carlas husband Nate.

I am so sorry for your loss. I kind of understand what your going through as our first son died of Trisomy too. He looks like a beautiful boy, it makes me sad and angry that he is not with you now. We are praying for you guys. I just wanted to encourage you from a guys perspective...it is tough to be a husband and a Dad with no baby and I'm praying for you.

Kristina Petrella said...

Your Maxson is truly beautiful. Knit together in the perfect way which only God knows how. Thank you for sharing your story as a family with us. We will continually be praying for you and your family.

Kristin said...

So beautiful. Again, we are praying for your family.

I will email you more details about this...but...when you are ready I would like to give you something.

I ran across a blog of someone that makes these wonderful Mommy Necklaces with your child's name on them. I had one made for a special request I had regarding one of my children.

I would like to give you one with Max's name on it as my gift to you.

Again, I'll email you the details and you can tell me where to send it...when you are ready.

Praying, praying, praying for your comfort at this time.

AmandaHoyt said...

We are so sorry for your loss. Max is beautiful.
Hugs and prayers,
Amanda

Polly & Steve said...

We are praying for your loss, words can not express or help at this time, the only thing that will help is to stay close to the Lord, and His comfort in knowing that Max is with him. I don't know you but you have been in my prayers since last week when I stumbled on you blog, God bless you two.
Polly and Steve

Rebecca Jo said...

Thank you for giving us an update. I so worried for Trish with the emptiness even inside of her... I know its got to be so hard on you to want to take care of your wife while grieving yourself.

And the pictures are wonderful - what a beautiful baby!!!! The first one with the wings on his back just made me cry instantly. To know that he is whole & complete now with Jesus... what a day when you will all be together again!

Praying still for your family!

Anonymous said...

What a true angel little Max is! He is absolutely gorgeous. I am keeping your family in my prayers.

Rebecca said...

I was thinking about your family all weekend. I will continue to lift you up in prayer. The pictures are so beautiful!

Anonymous said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. Max is just beautiful. I also lost a son to Trisomy 18 in January 2007. Thinking of you.

Karin said...

Max is absolutely beautiful! I look forward to seeing more pictures of him. You continue to be in our prayers!

Erica Beaudry said...

Your Faith and Love for the Lord is amazing. I will continue to pray for your family...the pictures are beautiful.

mrsrubly said...

what beautiful pics you posted. my heart aches for your family. continued prayers for you and the days to come.

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you guys and praying.

Anonymous said...

Dustin and Trisha,
Thinking about you today as you head home. Just take it one step at a time.
Amy Jorgenson

Sam said...

I did not discover your family until just before Maxson was born. I cannot imagine your pain but would like to offer this word that I read just this past Saturday. "God has promised His Presence"

Mandie Lane said...

What an absolutely gorgeous little boy. My heart hurts for your loss.

Anonymous said...

My heart is so heavy for you, I am so very sorry. Max is a beautiful boy!! I came across your blog last week and my thoughts and prayers have been with you since. I'm so sorry for the pain you are enduring right now.

Linda in ND

Kathleen said...

Praying for your comforting and that you will be surrounded by the love of your families and friends, but most of all by the love of the Most High. Max is having a wonderful time with Jesus. We do not grieve as those who have no hope -- but we do grieve. Allow yourselves to grieve.

Hope Wilson said...

What amazing & beautiful pictures of Max! Thank you for sharing your precious son with us...continued prayers in Georgia.

Lorisa said...

My heart is breaking for you and tears are rolling down my cheeks. As I read your blog, I am comforted by the fact that you have a wonderful relationship with God to help you through this. You don't know me, but I came across your blog tonight. I too have lost a baby to a chromosone abnormality and I relate to so many of the emotions that you have written, Trish. As a mother, you want to do everything that is right and everything you possibly can for your children, and your emotional struggle through the past months was incredible. May you find peace in knowing you did everything YOU possibly could. Please contact me if you wish, and in closing I will continue to keep you all in my prayers. The following days, weeks, and months are rollercoaster rides...this I know. God Bless!
Lorisa (mom to Angel Isabella Faith 1.19.06)
newmans@beu.midco.net

Jen said...

He's just beautiful... words cannot express it.

Collapse into those arms that hold Max now... they are strong, and there is room for everyone without one falling.

Stephanie said...

He is precious. I am so so sorry. I have been praying for you. I found your blog through Taylors. I was actually at Disney World the day Max was born but could not stop thinking of you guys. He is so precious and is a place far better than Disney. I cannot wait until we are all there together.
My heart is broken for you.
Praying in Tennessee.

Anonymous said...

Trisha and Dustin,

I have been silently following your journey through this blog, and today I read through it again trying to catch up after being gone...knowing you were going to have tough decisions to make, and tough times ahead. My heart aches for you. The power of your faith is amazing, and it will get you through this very sad time. I'm so sorry that you both have had to endure this kind of pain, and I pray for your hearts to be at peace. Max's angelic presence sparkles so brightly in the pictures you have posted. It's hard to imagine that his physical presence won't be with you, but he is tucked deep in your hearts and you will always find him there. May God bless you, and help you grieve for Max and celebrate his life every day. God bless you both and God bless Max.